I am allergic to everything. Before you roll your eyes, and say, "Oh, Emily, you and your hyperboles," no, really, I am. That test they give you where they stick you with stuff and test your reaction, I was allergic to EVERY thing on the test, including, but not limited to, pet hair, mold, dust, plantains, cockroaches. I didn't ask how they test for cockroaches, I don't want to know.
Being allergic to nearly everything is fun (not really). Here are some things that have happened: suddenly discovered allergy to penicillin about two years ago, took some and broke out in hives from head to toe. After gall bladder surgery, I was given another antibiotic, which not only broke me out in hives from head to toe, but also caused my eyes, ears, and face to swell. Have you seen "Hitch," where he has a food allergy? That was me, except add me running around, going "Oh my God, oh my God, Smitty, what do I do? What do I do?" Only he just looked at me and calmly said, "Settle down, drink some water, take a Benadryl, chill." Oh, if not for Benadryl, I'd be dead by now, probably. It's saved me from many a dog, cat, and dusty house.
If you bring a cat within a mile radius of me, I will immediately start to sneeze, my eyes water, and in some cases, swell. I discovered I was allergic to cashews about 3 1/2 years ago, and I will spare you the reaction that occurs after eating them. Seriously, you want to be spared. It's reminiscent of a scene from "Alien."
I tell you this because you should understand the joy it is to be me sometimes. We have to keep a little list of medications that cause varying reactions, and I'm always hesitant to take something new after the antibiotic incident this past summer. I generally avoid going outside, or it's Benadryl time. Also, I'm scared that if a wasp or something stings me, my throat will close up, as a new, fun allergy manifests.
There's a movie starring John Travolta that came out in the '70s called "The Boy in the Plastic Bubble." I'm seriously like one more allergen away from that. I'm sure I'll develop a dairy allergy combined with certain air, and bam, isolation chamber. I'll just make sure to have a bar in there..
2 comments:
My sister is allergic to everything EXCEPT cockroaches, an allergy I am creeped out by. I don't know what I'm allergic to as my fear of needles overrides my ability to take the test.
I still don't want to know what's in the vial they test you for with cockroaches. I think, on principle, we're all allergic to them..ew.
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