The Third of a Life crisis

Well, I've been back at the teat of my parents for approximately 3 weeks now, and here's what I've figured out about myself thus far (in no particular order):
I am a 28 year-old woman who doesn't own anything of value, I have no job, gray hair, laugh lines, my face has suddenly reverted to adolescence by breaking out inexplicably; I can't do anything girly like decorate to save my life; I have less than $200 to my name unless I start selling eggs or a kidney, and I want children so badly, my womb aches when I'm around them, yet the thought of marriage really and truly scares the bejesus out of me. Oh, and clearly, I live with my parents..
And yet, I'm not particularly suicidal over all of those things, because at long last, I think..I think I've figured out that nobody else has all of those things particularly figured out, and that is quite frankly, what life is. Also, I've had time to think A LOT (which is never really all that good at thing) about what things are right with me and what things are wrong.
I have always been a social kinda gal, one who thrives on what people think (whether I admit it is another story), almost defining myself through the eyes of other people, be they boyfriend, friend or casual acquaintance, and quite frankly, I've been left feeling empty most of the time due to that personality quirk of mine.
While, yes, it makes me easily comfortable with different kinds of people; I will know no stranger at a party, etc..it also has left me with odd feelings of loneliness, which would seem to be the opposite of what a social person would aspire to feel.
I guess what I mean is that when you adapt your personality so heavily to those around you, going along with what they want, you forget or ignore your needs and wants, and you end up feeling, as I have come to recently, that you don't know who you are or what your wants and needs are anymore.
Further, I think that I have a problem with relationships sometimes because while it takes quite a bit to really get me, in that Jerry Maguire "You had me at hello" kind of way, once I'm gotten, I turn into a mouth-breathing Stepford person, and that's no way to be either.
I'm setting some goals for myself while in Mississippi, because frankly, there's not a whole hell of a lot else to do, but I digress.
I figure that I've returned to my childhood home, the scene of the crime, so to speak, so if I don't work out some issues I have with myself while here, they will never be worked out.
It's a bit of an undertaking, yes, and I don't claim that I will "Dr. Phil" myself in less than a year, but I think this is a truly rare opportunity to figure out who I am and what I want before I move on to the next thing.
I wish I had a Magic 8 ball to pose life's big questions to that would tell me what my path should be, but I think that's part of the problem.
I've been expecting that Magic 8 ball in some form or another since college and continue to be disappointed by its elusiveness.
Not to sound like a complete kook, but I am my own Magic 8 ball, and all of those answers are within me. Clearly, it would be an uncomfortable ordeal to shake myself around each time I have a big question, so it would probably be wiser to stick with introspection in that regard.
See, I can be funny when having an existential crisis.
All that being said, just for my own edification, there are some awesome things about me, too, that I will never change and make me feel good about myself.
Those being in no particular order: My niece Jillian loves me a lot and refers to me as "her best friend" sometimes, (see above text about children making me ache -- this is why) I am an excellent Trivial Pursuit player and bowler, having at one point been in a league..bowling, not Trivial Pursuit..however, if there is a Trivial Pursuit league, do let me know, which leads into one of my other wonderful traits..I am a DORK. I like to explain how to diagram sentences, I love listening to NPR, especially Terry Gross, I liked the Lord of the Rings trilogy, Batman Begins, AND the last Star Wars movie, and I'll take you down if you make fun of me...and last, but not least, and really probably not last..I am irreverent, sarcastic and downright obnoxious sometimes, and I don't care. In the event that God hasn't cursed me relationship-wise, and I do end up with grandchildren, my grandkids will tell friends about their grandmother who flashed at Mardi Gras and St. Patty's Day when she was younger, did ridiculous karaoke with her closest friends, sang "Proud Mary" with a band on Beale Street, "Me and Bobby McGee in Jacksonville, Fla., not to mention Mississippi, and used the word "Fucko" as both an insult and term of endearment.
All hope is not lost.