An amalgamation of evanescent grandiloquence

As you may be able to tell, I'm deep within the confines of studying for the vocabulary portion of the GRE, and I've come to a few conclusions:
1. I am perhaps not as smart as I thought I was..shocking, yes, I know, but I believe it to be true. I can't decide if it's part of the gradual dumbing-down I feel I've been going through since leaving college, or if it's part of the ego deflations I have seemed to encounter lo these last months. Well, the latter is actually not an excuse as to why I'm dumb(er), it's merely an offering as to why I can accept it now.
As a sub-topic of being dumb, I think I may have been misusing a great many words for the last few years, which is somewhat more distressing. We snotty literary types have all had a giggle at those plebians who use the wrong words from time to time. Personal favorites are "supposably," "revert/refer back to," and "for all intensive purposes," and now I discover that those snottier than I may've been lording it over me that I thought "austere" meant strong, or "truculent" meant lazy. I won't even get into what I thought "alacrity" meant. It's better left unsaid.
So, naturally, the first night that I began my studies, which I thought would be a breeze, I got frustrated and wrote at the top of my page, "I'm too stupid to be accepted to graduate school," which I personally felt was a normal reaction.
However, after thinking about it, I guess it's conceivable that I'm just going to have to study that much harder instead of giving up immediately. Geez..exhibit follow-through? I guess it's worth a try.
On a different topic, after being in a super-cranky mood for the last week or so..(I plead hormones), it looks like perhaps I am snapping out of it, which is encouraging. Do you ever just plunge into a mood so foul that you cannot imagine not experiencing it? That's what we're talking here. I'm not even certain that I fully appreciated my 3-day weekend because of it, but I will damn sure appreciate my 4-day work week now that the fog has lifted.
I get like that sometimes, and, sure there are reasons why I was ill-tempered, but it seems as though my reaction may have been a little strong. I have mentioned at various points in this blog that my coping skills are not so hot, and they really aren't, but I think they're getting somewhat better. At least I recognize that I'm doing it now.
At least with this last hormonal/homicidal episode, I was just cranky, rather than crying at every sappy commercial I saw on television, which I have been known to do in times of despair. No, no, this was more of a focused, I-want-to-maim-everyone-I-see kind of a thing, which is by no means better, but at least takes less of an emotional toll on me. And, really, it's all about me..
I also rediscovered my David Gray "White Ladder" album yesterday and can't believe I had forgotten how awesome it is.
I will leave you with a line from my favorite song, "Hello, Goodbye"
"I put up with all the scenes. This is one scene that's going to be played my way."