On my way to work this morning, I got behind a car that had a "Baby on Board" sticker. Jesus, I didn't know they still made those, to be honest. Remember how those were everywhere at one point in the late '80s/early '90s. I never really understood the point of it.
Is the idea that obviously I would be headed to plow into the car, but, oh, wait, there's a baby in there, so I'll crash into someone childless.
I tend to think that it's more to let everyone who passes your car know that you, in fact, have a baby, like, "Look at me; I've contributed to society. I have a baby."
Which leads me to people imparting information to other people that only seems to serve the purpose of validating their lives.
There's a "Seinfeld" episode, one of the really early ones, and there's a scene that is still one of my favorites.
All of the gang goes to this horrible party in Long Island, and Elaine gets stuck talking to this woman and the conversation goes like this:
Annoying woman: Mary, have you seen my fiance? Where is my fiance? My fiance; I seem to have lost my fiance. The poor baby.
Elaine: Maybe the dingo ate your baby.
And the woman looks at her like she's on drugs and gets up, presumably to find her fiance.
I work with a guy who is quite odd and has the personality of a shoe and yet, every time I happen to be outside on a smoke break and am trying to make conversation with him, he invariably mentions his fiancee. A typical exchange:
Me: The weather is nice.
Weird guy: Yeah, my fiancee said that very same thing to me this morning.
Me: Ah. Yeah, I hope it stays this way.
Weird guy: So does my fiancee. We're getting married, you know.
I don't know if he thinks I'm trying to hit on him (he would be wrong), but I feel that it's more likely that he's so clearly bizarre, he needs the world to know that he is, in fact, loved by a woman.
It's funny, when I was engaged, fiance just didn't roll off the tongue. I ended up saying something like "This is Josh, he's my boyfri...ance. And I was always mildly uncomfortable when people noticed my engagement ring and asked me when the wedding was.
Now, there could be a number of reasons for this: I had no business getting married, I knew it was a match made in hell, or, and I choose to believe this, I just don't need to broadcast details of my life in order to validate myself.
I hate meeting people in an elevator, waiting room, etc..when, within about five minutes, I know that: they're divorced, they have ungrateful children, they've recently come out of the closet, or that antibiotic cream really paid off on that rash in their nether regions..
There is some stuff that simply needs to be kept to one's self.
I suppose it's ironic that I say that as I'm writing this for a blog on the Internet. But, whatever, do as I say, not as I do.
4 comments:
you should go to dinner at my grandmothers house, not only does she think "how are you" is a genuine inquiry into the staus of her every health condition but also does not shy away from speaking about such things at the dinner table. i have been flush faced more than once by her in front of friends during her bowel movement updates. however i will say that some of the TMI can be quite funny. I remembr while in the persian gulf, bored out of our minds, we'd frequently tell sex stories and just basically act like pigs. when it was one guys turn, after hearing several really freaky stories, he decided he had to do better and proceeded to tell us about his. true or not it provided to be TMI and left us with images we clearly didn't want and never looked at him the same again. Just goes to show some things are better off unsaid.
Yeah, but older people don't really count because they always impart too much information, especially about health. And guys who are bored telling sex stories..well, that's just par for the course, too.
I'm talking about total strangers who tell you stuff that you just don't need to know at all.
And I have so much trouble picturing you acting like a pig, let me tell you..
Am I allowed to post new comments on blogs of yore?? It's 456AM, I'm bored, and every one I know is asleep...i think we both know certain someone who feels the need to tell us TMI, and not even that it's gross, but either a) personal or b) extremely self centered, but that's old hat there... my best friend from Harrisburg used to fill us all in on the large status of her fiancees member...I think that had something to do wiht the fact that she was a late bloomer and also the last to lose her virginity. Again, a means of validation. Ugh! Be lame and be proud people! Fly that NERD flag. Hehe!!
Ha! I'm the mayor of Nerdtown..
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