Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Still on a college schedule..

I love to sleep. There are no two ways about it. If I didn't have to get up for work, I would sleep until at least noon every day. So, it's a good thing that I do have to get up for work, or I would be the most unproductive person in the world.
On any given morning, I have to forcibly make myself get out of bed, and it's not pretty. There are many mornings, like today, when it it harder than usual.
Do you ever notice how, when you're lying in bed and really, really don't want to get up, excuses for not going into work sound brilliant? I can remember using the excuse of "I was up really late last night, because I broke up with my boyfriend, and I just don't think I can make it in," when I had a job on campus in Mississippi. Granted, I had that job for three years, so they cut me more slack than others in the office, but I still can't believe I actually called an employer and said that.
Today, my excuse, and it was totally true, was, "I seem to have overslept. I'll be there within the hour," and I got an extra hour of sleep out of it.
The root of this problem is that I still keep college hours. Well, I don't stay up having existential conversations with cute long-haired boys until 4 a.m. like I did in college, but I do stay up until at least 1 a.m. and expect my body to hop to at 7 every morning.
I can't do it; I'm (dare I say it) getting old. I can't drink a 12-pack and make an 8 a.m. appointment anymore. I can't consistently deprive my body of precious sleep during the week and rationalize that sleeping for 14 hours on the weekend will undo that damage. And even on the weekends, I'm still staying out until at least 3 a.m., so that means a large portion of the next day is completely useless due to my hibernation.
I want to be one of those people who can just pop out of bed at 7 or 8 a.m., no matter what, and brag about all the crap they've gotten accomplished. I'm just not sure that's going to happen any time soon. I realize that if I make myself go to bed by 11, I would be able to do that, but that's the hard part.
I think I've equated being one of "those people" that goes to bed early, as truly accepting that I'm getting old, and I'm not ready to do that yet. I still want to be the girl that people call at midnight during the week to chat, because they know I'll be up.
Granted, it's probably taking a toll on my health, but surely all of the nicotine, alcohol and diet soda that I pour into my body will make up for that.

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